We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
