he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
my sisters under your porch take her home
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
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