how hairy? two words: wookie tits
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
no you cant smoke seaweed
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
