I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
