when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Randomize
