if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
do herpes really smell.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize