she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
