i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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