Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
