I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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