I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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