the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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