Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
