I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
