Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
