just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
