I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
