But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I just made out with a guy for $7.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh�
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
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