Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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