apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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