Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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