Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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