just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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