So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
my mouth tastes like poor choices
I think I died a long time ago.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
