just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
