Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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