Your mouth is God's brothel.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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