if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
