And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
