You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
