There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
no you cant smoke seaweed
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
