I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
