Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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