Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
