i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
