Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
