When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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