Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(415): View more from California

JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP

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(925): View more from California

Should I have kids to fix a relationship??

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(518): View more from New York

alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?

(1-518): View more from New York

dude. you drew those with your dick

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(540): View more from Virginia

hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring

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(304): View more from West Virginia

Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.

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(516): View more from New York

I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this

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