well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
