I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
