Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
