After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
my being single is dangerous.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
