Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
the day after is always just damage control
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
