I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize
