i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
