talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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