I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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