Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
