why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
