there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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